Onward!

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“A ship is always safe at shore, but that is not what it’s built for.”

~Albert Einstein

If life was sitting in front of me right now, I think it’d say, “That wasn’t a big of a leap enough.”

Honestly, I think that’s the reason why I didn’t mind the most recent rejection. And you know what? It was the silent kind, yet I’m okay having found out the way I did.

Going into the attempt of making a change, I knew it would have allowed me to keep everything the same. Yes, I would have made a bit more money. But had the opportunity worked out, I wouldn’t have been challenged. It would have required continuing to put up with what I’m aware is making me tired.

WHY are we willing to put ourselves through trials that we know we should walk away from? It must be that going through trials are life’s necessities.

Einstein said it. We are made to do more. If we can somehow be willing to unlock our potentials, we can maybe discover our purpose for living. And if nothing’s uncovered, I guess it means we get to shut our eyes and point in a random direction, hoping for the best.

I may not be excited, but I am curious to see what’s next. Because that opportunity didn’t work out, that means I’m needing to step outside my comfort zone and try something else.

Maybe life is expecting more from me than what I’ve been putting in.

Here I go!

Cue the trapeze.

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Perspective pedals a tiny tricycle around a path of twists and tangles, while honking a cheery horn. With a wagon red smile and frizzy kissed hair, my eyes try looking beyond the paint. It’s well done but not waterproof.

I tried following its logic, but the only thing I ask is—where does my heart get to rest in all this. I’m sure it’s allied with time, but the importance of the latter can wait outside the door until further notice. Though, the ticking doesn’t stop or is anything but silent.

But what if all the confusion that Perspective brings could be cleared up with a bunch of balloons. We could even hold a candlelit ceremony at sunset, say thanks, and watch everything ascend gracefully. Of course, I would welcome the winds’ whispered favor.

Then again, I’m sure five seconds after a peaceful sendoff, the time that I had totally forgotten about and tried to ignore would come crashing in. If it had rung the doorbell, I wouldn’t have heard it, for the only thing that kept me sane is up there with the balloons.

Perspective can be right.

Perspective can be wrong.

Perhaps, Perspective deserves a lollipop for all that I put it through.

 

 

 

Blog #11

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My brain scrunches up in angst and slides down to the end of my nose. And all that I can do to calm it is by remembering that the year is still young. Very young, indeed.

Not sure when I became the too careful type.  I remember diving forward without hesitation. There was no fear to flop, just pure innocence. As I’ve reflected the past career aspirations, I’ve concluded to stop pining for what was hoped for.  Instead, it’s okay to become who I’d like to be now.

But alas, I’m stuck again.

I see all the big opportunities out there that would require big leaps. But at the moment, I don’t think I’m cut out for the giant ones just yet. I definitely approached a few last year, but something inside me wants to jump but within limits. There are all these connections that I want to hold onto. And, it seems beyond me to jump off without knowing why.

The thing about wanting change, even small ones, doesn’t it require to give up something? And this is where I become wishy washy. I want change, but I currently feel at home with my current lifestyle. It has some steadiness and consistency to it, while leaving room for spontaneity. The problem, even if change were to come, a part of me secretly hopes things aren’t too different. And I know I can’t have both, change and sameness.

On the days when the world looks too big to handle, maybe that’s when I should consider poking at the opportunities that are intimidating. Someone is bound to have kicks and giggles during those times, and I hope it’s me.

If anything, I should try to be more curious about life’s opportunities. Maybe I could pretend life is one big drive, waiting for me and my out-of-socket-brain to turn down a street just to see where it goes.

 

 

 

 

What’s up? The ceiling, the sky, hopefully some birds.

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Sometimes, all you need to do is step outside for fresh air, and find appreciation in the surrounding beauty. Look up at the sky, and something is always going on. At times, it may simply be azure or stormy, the whole canopy in agreeance. But other times, there’s different things going on in different parts of the sky. One time, across the vast heavens, it was split into two halves: one side was dark and gloomy, while the other end was part blinding but also had a sunset. But the divide line where the dark and light halves clashed, there was the tiniest, faintest rainbow. But I wouldn’t have noticed it until I put on sunglasses.

And sometimes, I look in my rear view mirror, and see how it contrasts with the weather ahead. I could be leaving sunny skies, and be heading into a storm—or vice versa!

The sky in our minds can be similar with what goes on outside. It’s all in good spirits for one day, or all over the place the next. And somewhere amongst the chaos and peace, something good comes from it all. I have been proven that time and time again. But the major difference with our skies and nature’s—we’re in control of ours.

But the cool thing is that our minds can be whatever we want them to be.

Prison.

Garden.

Dark cellar.

Sunroof.

Nightmare.

Reality.

Discouraged.

Hopeful.

Gluten-free.

Maybe except the last one, the comparisons for the mind are infinite.

But the most important thing—the mind is ours.

Do what you will with yours. ❤